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Apr 26, 2022

In 30 years of personal development work, I’ve noticed several deep truths about the process of growing in our relationships. 

I’d like to share these truths with you today.

Because here’s the thing, when people are stressed or life feels nuts, it impacts our relationships. 

Take a moment and ask yourself:

“How present and aware can I be in life when it goes sideways?”

Can I stay:

  • Kind
  • Generous
  • Loving
  • Present
  • Give grace
  • Can I ask for grace for my foibles? 
  • Can I have wit and levity in the midst of life's shenanigans? 

In this powerful Relationship Alchemy podcast, you will discover keys to responding to life with more presence and awareness. And (PHEW!) there’s no mythical state of perfection that you have to get to to win.

Tune in to this episode: Keys to Continuing To Grow in Your Relationships

Key points covered in this episode:

✔️ Unlock yourself from shame. Often, our desire to grow stems from a place of scarcity. We feel bad about something, thinking we need to fix it, but that’s not the best starting point for growth.

✔️ Control your ego. The ego isn’t bad and certainly doesn’t need to be killed. It’s more important to recognize when it’s working for you and when it’s working against you. Be aware when it’s putting you in competition with your partner and blocking your growth.

✔️ Accept life’s challenges. A problem-free relationship is a myth. Don’t strive for perfection. Aim for presence and awareness instead. 

  • Ask yourself how you can give love and grace, even in stressful situations.
  • Can you stay level-headed in the midst of life’s shenanigans?

Being human means living a human life. The key lies in embracing and navigating imperfections.

✔️  Acceptance is the root of making new choices. Carl Jung said, “We can’t change anything unless we accept it.” Be welcoming of your current self as you work on the areas you want to improve and grow.

✔️ The ego will try to co-opt your  growth. The point of pursuing growth isn’t to put yourself on a higher moral ground than your partner.

If your partner isn’t also doing their inner work, you may start to feel that you’ve grown apart and your values don’t align anymore, but it doesn’t mean that you’re better than them.

✔️ Success is gauged by your ability to handle issues. Growth isn’t linear. It happens in more of a spiral. When old issues resurface, it isn’t a sign of failure, it’s a sign that you’re ready to encounter and work through a deeper layer.


★★★ About Marie-Elizabeth Mali ★★★

Marie-Elizabeth is the founder of Relationship Alchemy, where she helps people create loving and nourishing intimate relationships that support their work in the world.


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As a Relationship Alchemist, two-time TEDx Speaker, and host of the Relationship Alchemy podcast, Marie-Elizabeth Mali shows women how to cultivate deeper love and connection in their intimate relationships. Drawing on her Master’s degree in Traditional Chinese Medicine and over 20 years of working with clients, she teaches women how to show up as authentic leaders in their relationships and work instead of twisting themselves to fit in. Marie-Elizabeth’s work has been featured in Thrive Global, SWAAY, and Forbes. She is also a member of the Forbes Business Council, a published author with an MFA in Poetry from Sarah Lawrence College, and an underwater photographer who has a thing for sharks. Learn more at