Nov 23, 2021
I want to reframe the idea of "self-doubt" for you — instead of seeing it as a problem that needs to be fixed, look at it as evidence that you're stretching yourself beyond your comfort zone. The fact that you doubt yourself is a sign that you're on the edge of your growth, which is a great place to be.
However, you can take action so that when doubt comes, you can work more effectively with it when it arises so that it doesn't derail you.
Key points covered in this episode:
✔️ Our brains are wired to notice what's wrong, what's not working, what we're scared of, & what might be dangerous to us. We still retain the primitive brain we had before we evolved into our more sophisticated frontal cortex capable of conscious thought and choice.
✔️ Train your brain to start noticing wins throughout the day.
What are your three wins today? Whether big or small, regularly celebrating your wins trains your brain to start noticing successes making you feel more confident, capable and worthy — all of which help your self-doubt get quieter.
✔️ Don't make your fulfillment in life depend on having that one massive goal. Your goals and desires may change, and you may not ever fully get there. Something unexpected might happen and blindside you, and you don't end up going in the original direction you expected to go in. Suppose you've denied yourself the experience of feeling successful each day and having daily fulfillment because everything is riding on that one massive goal. In that case, nothing will satisfy you until you reach that finish line.
✔️ The more trauma that's stuck in your system, the harder it is to avoid getting triggered. Take an active part in your healing. Do some trauma release work with a practitioner, do some embodiment work and learn how to be safe in your nervous system. Set yourself up for a completely different life from all the trauma and drama of the past, and you'll find to be more powerful and magnetic to bring those goals to you more effectively than if you're scraping and grinding and driving yourself.
✔️ Recognize self-doubt is a good sign that you're stretching yourself and retraining your brain by celebrating your wins. Stop being stuck on having to fix self-doubt because it no longer means that something's wrong with you. Celebrate its arrival as a sign that you're on the right track.
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★★★ About Marie-Elizabeth Mali ★★★
Marie-Elizabeth is the founder of Relationship Alchemy, where she helps people deepen the love and fulfillment in their personal relationships, so they can expand into the full and free expression of who they truly are.
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As a Relationship Alchemist and two-time TEDx Speaker, Marie-Elizabeth Mali shows people how to cultivate deeper love and connection in their intimate relationships. Drawing on her Master’s degree in Traditional Chinese Medicine and over 20 years of working with clients, she teaches women how to show up as authentic leaders in their relationships and work instead of twisting themselves to fit in. Marie-Elizabeth’s work has been featured in Thrive Global, SWAAY, and Forbes. Marie-Elizabeth is also a member of the Forbes Business Council, a published author with an MFA in Poetry from Sarah Lawrence College, and an underwater photographer who has a thing for sharks. Learn more at http://relationshipalchemy.com.