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Nov 1, 2022

Returning to the dating scene middle-aged and post-divorce can be terrifying for most. But Paul Aaron Travis has been on over 100 dates and counting – the experience proving to be fruitful and life-changing.

He shares with us his advice for individuals like him about letting go of expectations, authenticity vs intimacy, tracking your dates and potential partners, and finding your partner through effective questioning.

Tune in to this episode: Dating After 40 with Paul Aaron Travis.

Key points covered in this episode:

✔️ Utilize helpful tools. Paul recommends attending gatherings such as his Singles Salon, follow a blueprint like his 40-Plus Dating Reset, and use a dating log to list key details of your dates, such as:

  • Last time they contacted you
  • How long you’ve been dating
  • Any red or green flags

✔️ Authenticity vs. Intimacy. Although interconnected, they are different.

Authenticity is presenting who you really are to the world and how you live. Intimacy is being genuine within to allow others to enter your world.

✔️ Do a vibration check. Consider why you’re dating in the first place. Then, don’t rush the process of meeting new people. As we are experiencing collective anxiety about the future, it’s important to choose someone who strikes the right chords.

✔️ There is power in questions. People who’ve had bad breakups and bad dates may feel cynical. But engaging in deep conversations with your dates can help change your mind. Listen to their dreams, dealbreakers, what turns them on, and what doesn’t. Don’t let your fear win over meeting your potential partner.

✔️ Practice detachment. Letting go of expectations can help you be more vulnerable and cushion the pain during rejections. Be open to whatever can happen. You may meet a new best friend or someone that can benefit from your knowledge or support.


Paul Aaron Travis’s commitment to making dating joyful, respectful, expansive, and consensual comes from extensive training in interpersonal relations - from Nonviolent Communication to the Wheel of Consent, from Landmark Education to Human Awareness International, from Body Electric to ISTA/Tantra.

For years, Paul co-facilitated the Seattle Men’s Wisdom Council, working with hundreds of men every month. In the years since his divorce, he has dated 100 women – mostly first dates which didn’t yield sufficient chemistry to continue yet helped him create the technique he now teaches that manifested three wonderful, multi-year relationships.

Website: www.Pandemic.Love





Free Gift:

4 Big Dating Mistakes Spiritual Singles Over 40 Are Making in ’22:


★★★ About Marie-Elizabeth Mali ★★★

Marie-Elizabeth is the founder of Relationship Alchemy, where she helps women transform the patterns that get in the way of having the loving, intimate, and connected relationships they’ve always wanted.


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As a Relationship Alchemist, two-time TEDx Speaker, and host of the Relationship Alchemy podcast, Marie-Elizabeth Mali shows women leaders how to cultivate deeper love and connection in their intimate relationships. Drawing on her Master’s degree in Traditional Chinese Medicine and over 20 years of working with clients, she teaches women how to show up as authentic leaders in their relationships and work instead of twisting themselves to fit in. Marie-Elizabeth’s work has been featured in Thrive Global, SWAAY, and Forbes. She is also a member of the Forbes Business Council, a published author with an MFA in Poetry from Sarah Lawrence College, and an underwater photographer who has a thing for sharks. Learn more at